Mother's Day Marvel

By Heather Shumaker
Ohio Outstanding Teacher of the Year for 2013 - my lovely mother

Ohio Outstanding Teacher of the Year for 2013 - my lovely mother

All books have an inspiration.  Mine was my mother.  She's worked 40 years at a remarkable preschool in Columbus, Ohio where they truly believe in free play.  When I say truly, I mean they go so far as to give three and four-year-olds boxing gloves and allow them to wrestle and roughhouse in the classroom.  The original title of my book was Boxing at Preschool (published as It's OK Not to Share).  Of course, I dedicated it to her.

This Mother’s Day I’m honoring and celebrating my mother.

I've always known she was a marvel when it comes to children.  Inside our own family and community we knew it.  Now she's being recognized for it statewide.  Last week my mother was awarded Outstanding Teacher of the Year for preschool in the state of Ohio.  Flowers, banquet, portrait, pewter trophy and scrapbook of all the lovely nomination letters people wrote explaining how she changed their lives.

In her award speech, my mother (who loves spending a day with three-year-olds, but hates public speaking) made a strong plea for PLAY in children's lives.  I'd like to share part of her speech with you that earned her two standing ovations:

Thank you to everyone involved.  I am most grateful.  I was completely surprised by the announcement that I was the winner because I didn’t even know that I had been nominated.

This award is especially meaningful because it honors a school I’ve devoted my life to --- the School for Young Children and its play-based philosophy.

At the School for Young Children we know that kids need time and space for free play without teachers telling them what to do.  That wrestling matches in the classroom are OK.  That boys can wear princess dresses.  That kids can paint their arms and feet purple.  This type of play helps kids develop socially and emotionally.  That’s the core of our preschool program, and it has remained strong for the past 43 years, despite many national swings of the pendulum.

The School for Young Children was started in 1969 by two forward-thinking women.  It has made a profound  difference in my life.  When I first encountered the preschool I was a struggling new parent.  I felt uncomfortable with my children’s feelings, unless they were happy.  I soaked up knowledge from mentors at the School for Young Children, became a teacher, and stayed.

Forty years later, I am still learning.

I feel so lucky to have found this very supportive and loving community of teachers and parents.  Both my son and daughter attended the preschool and they are here tonight. Both my children are writers, and my daughter felt so strongly about the School for Young Children that she wrote the book It’s OK Not to Share, which summarizes its philosophy.

There are a lot of expectations that pressure young children these days.  When in doubt, trust your own instincts, trust your children’s play ideas, and Let Kids Play!     Thank you.

What’s lovely is that, besides putting Free Play front-and-center, my mother admitted that she’d started out mothering with lots of good intentions but not much knowledge.

That’s where we all start.  With love and good intentions.  But we need more.

I wrote my book for parents like my mother when she was young.  It shares the accumulated wisdom of 75 early childhood professionals.  Knowledge of child development, advice from wise souls, and trusting your own parental instincts will make life much brighter.

Happy Mother’s Day to one and all!

Have you been touched by a special mother or teacher?  Who has smoothed your way? Who would you nominate for a special Mother’s Day award?

8 responses to “Mother's Day Marvel”

  1. Rachel says:

    Your mother is one of the greats and it has been my pleasure getting to know her through my family's relationship to SYC. Her OAEYC award was deserved and I'm glad she used her acceptance speech to continue to spread the message that free play is necessary and valuable. Thanks for continuing to shine a light on this important value and your very special mother.

  2. Alyxandria says:

    As a student completing my A.A. in ECED, and going on to get my B.S. in Education and Child Development, I am inspired by your mother's teaching philosophy and the mission of the program she serves. Play-based and interest-lead curriculum is SO important and yet so difficult to find in programs nationwide, and I'm very happy that your mother is someone who has spent her life practicing and raising awareness of the methods that I've come to feel so strongly about. Happy Mother's Day to you and to your mother!

    • Heather Shumaker says:

      Wonderful - wonderful. I wish more people studying child development fully believed in play-based learning. Best of luck to you and may you become a mentor for many people in your field.

  3. Heather - This is a beautiful tribute to you mother. Even more so, however, is your life. "The proof is in the pudding," as they say. Your mom not only did a terrific job with you, the ripples of her life have far-reaching, positive waves in the educational arena.

    As an adult, I tracked down my fifth grade teacher, Mrs. Kline, and told her what an amazing positive influence she had been on my life.

    Parents and teachers shape the future - our children.

    • Heather Shumaker says:

      Thanks from the "pudding!" So glad you took the time to find your elementary school teacher and thanked her properly. I'm sure she was overjoyed to hear from you.

  4. Congratulations to your mom, Heather. What a great honor and wonderful validation of the SYC philosophy.

    My mother is the living embodiment of unconditional love. She's been 100% supportive of whatever we three children have strived for. She may not have known it at the time, but she was a practitioner of the "It's OK Not to Share" philosophy of child rearing. She only stepped to mediate arguments if someone was hurt or about to be hurt, or property was in danger of being damaged or had been.

    Her standard response to the summertime "I'm bored, Mom," complaint was "Go outside and play." 99% of our play was unsupervised by adults and we truly did learn how to cope with differences, negotiate, be patient, deal with problems and conflicts, and just plain "get along with others."

    She'd step in as the authority only when the situation demanded discipline, but we always knew it was our behavior that was at fault, not ourselves. Hugely important for kids to know that their behavior and their selves are two different entities.

    And she was always there if we needed a bandaid, a comfort food hot lunch of chicken noodle soup and PB&Js, or just a hug at the right time. Thanks, Mom.

    (All my favorite teachers happened to be male, so I don't have a teacher story appropriate for Mother's Day.) 🙂

    • Heather Shumaker says:

      A wonderful story for Mother's Day - thanks, Chris. I love her "Go outside and play" philosophy and you're right - "Hugely important for kids to know that their behavior and their selves are two different entities.'

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